I thought the sun would wake me up, but apparently that wasn't the plan. Because there was no sun. It was pouring out and we were enveloped in a very large cloud. So the hanging bridges tour in the forest for the morning was out. None of us could sleep, so we were at the restaurant for breakfast before it opened - 6:25. And there was Dennis waiting for us! I think he slept there.
So after a relaxing breakfast(now it was 7:20am but felt like noon), we decided to make a spa day out of it. We started in the gym which also overlooked the volcano and worked out for an hour.
Then up to the restaurant for lunch. We decided our favorite dish for lunch was the shrimp casadilla which we all ordered for the rest of the trip. Oh and did I mention beer, margaritas and mojitos??? Yum Yum. The view from the restaurant and the bar is like from our room and so amazing. I could have sat there all day long.
Who are those HOOOOTTT Ladies at the bar?!?
Our Private Bar Was The Best Spot In The Resort
And We Were The Only Ones There The Entire Time!
The main building sits on a very steep hill and is a series of 4 levels - and therefore 4 flights of steps? 20 times a day.
Up to the spa we went for three massages. My masseuse was good. She said "Lady - how you like your massage?" It was great, except she used something that felt like butter, and massaged my butt more than any other body part. Hum. I didn't need to moisturize that night.
Robin loved hers but was still looking for that foot massage.
We then treked down to springs. They are a series of cascading man made free form pools that are fed fed from springs warmed by the volcano. And they are all different sizes and temperatures. I don't think I've stayed in warm water long enough to make my fingers shrivel since I was a kid!
What a relaxing day.......that was until we got in the taxi to take us to dinner that night.
A restaurant called the Gingerbread came highly recommended. So we jumped in a cab, in the rain, back out to the very windy, hilly road, and drove, and drove, and drove, Did I mention - faster and faster and faster. The roads are so narrow and winding that the drivers drive in the middle of the road, strattling the double yellow lines. I hear Debbie yelling stop stop. I look up and there is a small white dog in the middle of the road getting closer and closer and then he disappeared. I dont think we hit him, but I'm pretty sure we must have tapped him. And that's the thing - there are lots of dogs walking on the side of the road, and a lot of really fast drivers and it isn't a good mix.
We finally get to the restaurant an hour later, pretty shaken up and feeling a little car sick(again - somewhat of a recurring theme for me and Deb throughout the trip). We walk in and the restaurant is very pleasant - painted a warm terra cotta color with lots of mirrors and art work on the walls. The hostess/waitress asks us if we have reservations? Of course we do we say. She waves her hands and says it doesn't matter and walks us to a booth. A short bald fat man is yelling from the back of the restaurant - too many people without reservations at the top of his voice! What's up with that we ask? Oh don't worry, he's the chef and owner and just very excited to cook for everyone? Hello? And it just got weirder from there.
The hostess/waitress comes back and tells us she is from Wisconsin(we won't hold it against her) and has lived down here for about 8 years. Good so she MUST know how to speak spanish - tell us how to say slow? It was definitely something we needed to know before we got back in the cab. Oh good question she murmurs. I'm not sure - there are a few ways to say it I think. Let me close my eyes and think about what the road signs say. Ok so she's been here 8 years and isn't sure how to say "slow"? Can you say stoned? Because after the first 2 minutes we were pretty sure she was.
So can we order some wine we ask? Sure, what would you like? Well, do you have a wine list? No. Uhm, ok can you tell us what kind of wine you have? Yes, red and white. Do you know what kind? No. See the bottles over there(she points to behind the bar where a wine rack goes from floor to ceiling). Can we go look? No they're too high. Could you bring a few bottles over? Sure. How much are the bottles of wine? Between $35.00 and $65.00. Oh great, that really narrows it down. Gee thanks. So Stoned Weird Wisconsin Waitress(now she's SWWW) - who by the way looks a little like Edith Bunker, comes shuffling over with bottles stuffed under her armpits and elbows. Robin looks them over, stoned waitress guesses at a price of a few, and we finally agree upon one. Phew! Are we having fun yet?
Ok, so we had a glass of wine and are feeling a little better. So SWWW is ready to share what is for dinner tonight. Menu? Of course not. Prices? Be serious. So she rattles off(more like plods through) a list of appetizers and entrees. But she warns, the portions are very big and meant to be shared. The chef doesn't like guests ordering their own meals. Wow? For real? Yes she says. Ok. It's a good thing we all like the same kind of food or I guess we'd be SOL. She doesn't laugh. I guess we really are buzz kills. We order a green salad, sauteed mushrooms that WW swears are to die for, muscles in a white wine sauce, and a seafood and pasta dish as our entree........ and wait with great anticipation.
She eventually brings out both the salad and the mushrooms and the muscles all at once. Ok. So we start with the salad on the very small plate that she has brought out. About 2 minutes go by and she is back at our table. The chef thinks it is rude to not eat hot and cold at the same time. The flavors are meant to meld together to create the dining experience. Ok great says Robin, so could I have another plate? NO! says she. The chef would be insulted. That's ok, said Robin I'll live with it. Meanwhile Debbie and I allowed the salad over dressed with balsamic to run into the sauteed mushrooms on greasy toast. Oh and the dry muscles that looked like they were on steroids. Where are the hidden cameras? Hello? This has to be a joke - it is just way too weird.
So the food Nazi finally comes wandering by our table. Now mind you he has spent more time walking around the restauarnt like a bald peacock as one guest after another blithers on about how wonderful his food and restaurant is. Maybe they were stoned too? I'm still not sure how he had time to cook the food with all his prancing about in the dining room. I forgot what he said to us, but Robin heard a "provincial" under his breath when he walked away. Shame on us for separating his below par dishes.
The main dish finally arrives - spagetti with some small overcooked clams, and large pieces of raw carrots and raw string beans. Yum Yum. Gourmet at it's best. Robin really pushed the envelope by ordering more wine and refusing to serve herself a portion of the lovely main course. SWWW was at our table in a flash. Please put some food on your plate she pleaded to Robin. Chef will be highly insulted if you don't at least try it. Wow! It really was time to go! So we paid the bill, further insulting them by not getting the best desserts in Costa Rica.
On a positive note we learned how to say slow - despacio - and repeated the word despacio despacio despacio at least 20 times to the bewildered driver. Who to his credit drove about 15 miles per hour all the way back. I was happy to be back at the resort before midnight, but at least without risking limb and neck to get there.
I think he was supplying the reefer to the restaurant we had just left, because he was on the phone at least 20 times on the way back. Deb was in the front and picked up on loco, americans, ladies.
Good night!!
Say Cheese Or Marijuana!
Or Even Better - F**k You and F**k Her Too?
I'm Just Sayin....................
